Back in the saddle again

Trent is just over 7 months old.
We are heading in for round 2.
I am hoping that there is some truth to the idea that you are extra fertile in the year after you give birth. I've had more than one friend who needed the medical establishments help in conceiving number one, who got pregnant first time 'round all on their own for number two. I wouldn't expect to be so lucky (since, as I have mentioned before, I think the universe has some beef with me) but it sure would be great if we could be.
I would love for it to work for us the first month we try. If it worked out, that would mean that Trent would be 16 months old when numero dos made his/her appearance. I think that's good timing. The only thing that really concerns me about Trent still being so young with number 2 is that he may not be sleeping in his own bed/crib yet. I can't see us having two babies in the bed with us. There is barely enough room for both of us with just Trent in there.
He does sleep like a starfish though.
I look forward to being pregnant again, and with Christmas having just passed, it makes me look forward to the time when we have a lot of kiddies to share those times with.
I am not even charting like last time. My cycles are still out of whack since I do still breastfeed a bit. They seem to be regulating to a standard length, just waaay longer than they used to be. I can only go by cervical mucous now. Sorry if that's a little too much info.
Fingers crossed.

Technically, not a lie

You see, I said that there was nothing new I could post. Not that there was nothing new to post.
Even now, I think its a bit early to let the cat out of the bag, as it were, but, now I figure I can tell you about the news. Check it out over here.

Abandoning the climb

I don't think that I will be posting much on here any more.
There just isn't anything new that I can post.

I am so weak, so so weak

Toward the end of the past 12 months or so, I have been very good at eliminating and then ignoring all possible "pregnancy" symptoms. Month one, I thought my sense of smell was heightened, but it was just the over-active air freshener in the bathroom.

Month two I was able to ignore the sense of smell symptom, but then fell victim to the lower-back ache symptom. Month three, I was able to ignore the sense of smell, and the lower-back ache, but then succumbed to the sore boobs symptom. Month 4... well, you get my drift.
I slowly eliminated all possible symptoms. I had just never paid so much attention to how I felt before the start of a new cycle. Now, I can write off almost everything as just a symptom of PMS.
But now, now I am having trouble not finding symptoms again.

So, the sore boobs? Back, but a different sore, and in a different place
Also, leg cramps. Possible? Yes. Probable? No

But the biggest sign of all...

I had a very intense cramp, the kind that I only have when I am a good 2 or days into the cycle.
And I am only 9DPO today. Could be implantation?? Maybe??

I am weak, so very weak. I am succumbing to Hope again.

B*tch.

I DO have a post in me (Dream Analysis; 8dpiui)

Night before last, I had a bit of a strange dream. I dreamt that I had a... well, lets just say a male reproductive organ. Usually, I don't remember my dreams at all, and if I do, they are always pretty straightforward, just reliving events that happened durin the day, or straight-up nightmares or stress dreams. But this, this was a pretty odd element that I felt that I should look up the symbolism of. Here is what I found:

To see a penis in your dream, signifies sexual energy, power and fertility.

I also found:

If a woman dreamt she had a male organ: if she is pregnant means she will have a baby boy, if she is not pregnant means her money will increase.

I have to say, I am OK with either of those (although I would prefer the former). Then, last night, I have more bizarre dreams. I think a chick that, once waking, reminds me of Anne Coulter (but without the douchebaggery) figured in it, but she wasn't prominent. The 2 things from my dream last night that really stuck with me, was that I owned a cow. I had adopted a white and tan cow, had brought her to a big farm to stable her there, and then, when I came back a few hours later, I couldn't find her. This is what a cow can symbolise:

In our dreams, this simple domestic animal can represent a variety of very important and deeply-felt issues. In some cultures the cow is a sacred symbol, representing divine qualities of fertility, nourishment and motherhood... The cow is mostly a positive dream symbol, and superstition-based dream interpretation say that grazing cows are symbols of prosperity, contentment and happiness.

So, both dreams have a fertility aspect to them. Interesting. But then... the final element to my dream... I was supposed to catch a train to go home, but I missed it because I didn't have my luggage. Guess what missing a train means in your dreams...

missing a train in your dream could mean a missed opportunity

Oh GREAT!

My interpretation has to be that my subconscious is telling me that I am in fact, not pregnant. It knows I am trying my damnedest, but sorry, yet another missed opportunity.

How depressing. Even my subconscious is working against me.